New Ride!

Well kinda. After driving a mighty AT-AT, driving anything else is like shooting wamp rats back home. Pretty tame. These days I'm relegated to driving a Sand Crawler. I feel like a soccer mom driving this thing around. Despite losing my ride I'm looking forward to purchasing something that looks like a YT-1300 light freighter I can nickname The Falcon. Of course I'll try my best to get it in Dodger Blue.

T-47 brings down AT-AT

Saturday night while stomping my way down to San Diego to visit other Jedi at the Annual Comic-Con I was attacked by a drunk T-47 pilot. Rather than use a harpoon and tow cable like most conventional snow speeder pilots, this one decided to crash into a wall, pushing it into my lane.

With only parsecs to react and the AT-AT's inability to swerve like a pod-racer, I struck the wall at full speed. The impact launched me into the air breaking one of my legs. After landing and having only three legs to control the damaged AT-AT, it succumbed to the excess weight and nothing to hold it up and I fell on my side where I dragged along the ground for about 20 feet when my broken leg caught on something flipping me over onto my remaining, now damaged legs and it finally fell on its chin. Medical droids arrived soon after and they all malfunctioned after they saw me walk away from the metal carnage.

*Obviously now that the tragedy has passed I can laugh about it on this blog but to be serious for a moment, I am fine. I should be dead. The drunk driver was traveling on the opposite side of the freeway when she hit the center divider head first pushing a portion of the wall into my lane where I hit it. I flew, I flipped, I dragged and flipped again. I walked away with a small scratch on my left elbow.*











Drunk didnt fair much better:

I got gas

So, this morning I set out on the AT-AT to West LA to run some governmental business and I am now the proud owner of filed income tax returns. Why drive out to WLA to get them done you ask? Because there are people in this world that love me and will do it for me for free. Alas, that was not my only reason to drive or else I would have probably taken mass transit; I volunteered some time today to the American Cancer Society's Daffodil Days and had agreed to deliver daffodils to sponsors and other important people. I know have the best smelling AT-AT in the Universe. I made it back to Hollywood just in time to attend my weekly CERT Training Course where I learned that using my Light Saber to cauterize wounds is somehow not the Jedi way.

After my course ended I hopped back in the AT-AT to head back to WLA to attend a seminar being given by Homeboy Industries. I noticed that my ride was low on plasma so I stopped by a Chevron to fill up. The only pump that was not being used was the farthest from the cashier which under normal circumstances would not be a problem since I have my trusty Bank of Jedi Master Tommy bank card. For some unearthly reason the stupid machine said my card didn't work and I had to walk to the cashier. They invented Pay-at-the-pump to make life more convenient and faster for those who have time management problems. I, did not want to inconvenience myself so I said, "Fuck you! My AT-AT runs on Midichlorians, bitch!" and I left.

In other transportation news, the East Hollywood Neighborhood Council has been busy these last few days making statements and setting precedents. First, last Thursday the NC released a video showing their vision on transit and planning at a Town Hall sponsored by the Hollywood Coalition of Neighborhood Councils, which was featured on LAist.com. Then, last night, the NC became the first in no doubt a long and distinguished list of groups, government agencies and other jedi councils to endorse the Cyclist Bill of Rights which was drafted by Jedi Master Box, Jedi Mistress Box and Jedi Master Will Campbell among others, cementing themselves as the NC of the 21st century, that those other NC's with GHP's should begin to look at for progressive ideas. Given the stubborn nature of those other boards, I wouldn't hold your breath. More info on the precedent setting NC here, here and here.

Upgrade

Last night I went out in my AT-AT in search of an upgrade on my R2 unit. My current one had a bad motivator and had been giving me some problems lately. I stopped by a toshi station and looked around, worked with a few of the units and decided I didnt need to upgrade my r2 unit.... I needed a protocol droid. After some bargaining and a few jedi mind tricks I walked away from the toshi station with a brand spankin new protocol droid. Dodger Blue naturally.